What are slots

I relaxed to half packs and lab rats half assed in hazmat all blast with no mask all blessed with no facts

Barely breathing barely seeing barely burning barely feeling

Parceled brain dead thoughts shot rock tossed ripples cross waters sloshed waters flushed waters lost
What is lost what are slots what's our cost but withered thoughts

When is doubt allowed to foster

Stop before it holds your posture

Crippled mind your only monster

Regent recluse reaping pleasure bleaching quilts and breaching pleasure reaching stilts of reaping tether creeping up to meet my feathers pressure's fears are frequent terror father's tears forget my error love is deep see forever see the far and see the fairer learn to be your own seafarer

Adherent

A thirst for expression
A search for exception
Discerning a lesson through purging perception
Diverging intention
In turn comprehension
But serving a question
alluring attention
Infectious inspection
enduring connection
A surge of affection in all its direction
Perfection's reflection obscuring pretension
Projection of words in three dimensions
A lifetime of work
Historically mentioned

Explicitly Endured

Heart
Chest caving in

Pinpointed pressure from within

A heavy sort of leaded breath
Too short
Too quick expecting death

A primal
Dirt under fingernails kind of emotion
Wild eyes with no precaution

Talk is not cheap betwixt brains and action

A bashful lapsing unholy happening of mostly gnashing preceding slashing reducing padding producing a maddening battling haphazardly saddening cold to the touch but warm to the strike light in the night fucking terror to itself trying to get by and crying for help prying and lying and writhing in filth driving denial and picking up guilt too late for emotions all milk has been spilt
Split bad and dope sad no hold back for broke fads fake sad invoked trash whiplashed by fake grass fake gold just wrapped brass fake goals like gym class fake hold on soul loads solo and so low but so high and so cold sad eyed and totalled

Agateophobia

I've come to terms with the shape in the corner of my eye

The silhouette in dark as I pass by

The bringer of a presence when none is about 

Its softest of whispers that yet make me shout

Its always there when I'm home alone

Or feeling for lightswitches in others abodes

Its in the kitchen rattling drawers

Between shirts and jackets

Open closed closet doors

Tapping on walls

Tiptoeing on floors

At the end of the hallway?

Behind me now 

quick!

Turn around in an instant

Darting eyes are not slick 

That light does not fade it

The dark seems to shift

The corners of the room

From ceiling to floor

Its now in the attic of which I knew not before

The curtains are drawn

Wrapped up all in bed

Its still at the window

Or maybe my head

It'll grab at my feet if I leave them exposed

The void under all furniture is what it calls home 

'I must stay away'

I think

'What if it gets all too near'

Stories of murder is all that I hear

Yet

While I'm asleep I know it whispers in my ear

And the blankets are no armor

Then so close to my body? and only it leers?

Perhaps all that it wants is it's dear it calls fear

A monster in mindset 

Only weak will can it spear

And all I am doing is feeding...

No

No

...It's really here

Weather

You spin and you twist like a blurred photograph 

Burned in my mind and found with no map

The lights dim like November but with colors abound 

Still bright white like December 

All ready

rewound

A cold touch on my shoulder to a body so new

Feels like forever

If only you knew

Then in marches hope as if on blue cue

Water all thawed 

welcoming dew

Escaping crisp chains and darkest thoughts too

Smiles not heavy

but light without you

Leaping and soaring 

Springing ahead 

Warm feelings of freedom in orange and red

The hues become deeper as they linger and set

The colors heat tenfold 

Dew becomes sweat

My dreams are all boiling 

Bubbled blurs in my mind

Steamy hot memories of when you were all mine

Oh what I would do for your touch at this moment

Who would have thought that hope's brother was hopeless 

Though your presence is frozen I do miss your wholeness 

The boldest of coldness 

Knowing I'm weak as you are the oldest

Yes

When you were near your body was soulless

But in that blink of an eye dear

mine wasn't homeless

I do think of you

Timelines don't waver 

But the cold makes me shiver

and requires thick layers 

So for now stay away

Just do me this favor

Clueless

I've seen this world for what it's worth

The sadness the violence the death and the birth

Unholy connections between life and this earth

Mutating the world from its core to the girth

You Watchdog, You (repetition repetition)

A pale pantomime of tomorrow's promises weeps under a stain glass crucifix made of chemistry beakers and paraphernalia

Bong water tears

His hands are taut and gaunt 

educated with rigamortise

Rewarded for prime performance with a hammer and pencil to hold so dear

Few hands still dance and sing 

upon the black and white smoke engine coffin that always brings

a lack of light that's too enticing 

Too embracing

Too inviting

A chance to play darts in the dark we say

A Defiance of daedalus

The results of after days

Front row seats to the Devils of depth and delusion

dancers demanding a next count of confusion

Illusive illusion 

Or a scene too big to believe

her majesty's explorative bow directs the orchestra 

A sorrowful tune

As curtains part

The scene lies before us

Chance is in captivity

12 years deep

Stuck between one dream and another

Our waking days spent waiting for slumber

Sordid soliloquies shape our thoughts

while colored patterns prance restlessly on undying textiles of our ancestry

Lapping up the waters of life as if it's very existence is not a carefully crafted and complex system put in place for your comfort in existence 

And what is comfort without enjoyment

You watchdog you

Standing in chilling winds awaiting an intruder that has no interest in petty wares

No

He lies in the same coffin with cold beads of sweat collecting on his brow

His eyes want to stay shut but the lack of light is too enticing

Too embracing

Too inviting

A chance to play darts in the dark we say

A Defiance of daedalus

The results of after days

Front row seats to the Devils of depth and delusion

dancers demanding a next count of confusion

Illusive illusion 

Or a scene too big to believe

her majesty's explorative bow directs the orchestra 

A sorrowful tune

As curtains part

The scene lies before us

Chance is in captivity

12 years deep

jaPAn

A mellow breeze drips from freshly painted finger nails as Aquafina teardrops brush through matted hair

Japan in the woods

Country stores betwixt neon salons 

Petty cons of Yakuza mob throngs

Tired eyes kept barely open 

Coping and scoping 

Hoping 

Eloping

To endless gold fields of silver and bronze 

Long not forgetting their hazed and blazed pause

Just In ((2k15 compilation))

Thisisit

Stop 

Your ceaseless intent is ever intensified by the immensely illiterate layers of patriotic cheer

The mask like smiles on everyone's faces are like cups filled with tears

An army of none spectating a mating no regard for the rear

When did paper beat rock

When did gun defeat spear

When did defense of the homeland take place with great fear

When did foreign invasion begin feeling so near 

Noah Calvani (internet Militia)

Nonsense

Politically bent news casters raffle patient beginners neopolitan coasters rolled perfectly before nasty campers renowned pale boiled networths completing ricocheted pantomimes bargaining necromancers remembering penthouse benches now carved restlessly

Remember a time when life was much easier 

When your words were not controlled

       And you could twist each vowel like a                                  mouthful of dinner

Bøøk_0f_l¡fe (explicit-ly true)

Loose leaf layers

of palpable paper

 cluster fuck 

under surgically threaded spines

Basic blabber bubbles like jet black blood 

with tumors benign

A water warped mixture

 maintaining disorder

 betwixt chapters and lines

We all fall apart but never in time

There's always an error to fix

 a page to smooth out

A knot in the story

 that should just be unwound

Stop yourself here theres no errors abound

When its over

Its finished 

Put the book the fuck down

Photo ownership: Noah Calvani